As a Doctor of Divinity I am called upon regularly to perform weddings, esoteric rituals and the last rites for deceased pets.  2010 has been an unusual year filled with strange requests.  However, the weirdest came from a sheep farmer in Co. West Meath, Ireland.  Needless to say I've taken an oath of secrecy to protect the reputations of both the living and the dead.

The countdown to the new year is indeed a time of joy, compassion and generosity of spirit.  Therefore, I ask all of you to join with me in a prayer from the heart that my meager wish list will be granted by he who cannot be named.

1)  A more realistic Bear suit

2)  Seven Basses, a different one for every day of the week

3)  Melon flavoured Chewing Gum

4)  A time travel machine

5)  An elegant 100 bedroom, 100 bathroom, French Chateau near Big Bear, CA (for all my friends and family to live in, complete with cooks, maids, drivers, nannies etc...)

6)  A Victorian Gothic Church and/or Asylum, with recording studios

7)  Another SURGEON MARTA gig at Pappy & Harriets (or some other wacky/kitschy out of town venue)

8)  A Dream Recorder

Not too much to ask for I don't think!

Rx, Rev Dr. Belvis

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